Captain’s Log: December 2022

This was a bit of a train wreck of a month. We had a decent winter and hit December full of optimism and had plans to do something every weekend. Alas. It was a bit of a mess. Still in the darkness I did have some fun and on the plus side we arrive at 2023 none the worse for wear really.

First Weekend

A new tartan carpet was fired in late on the first Friday and a new Sofa arrived too. This is where the home improvements were parked this winter. The room still needs decorating but there we are. I am instantly happier with my house as it is possible to clean this room at last. It is warmer. Dare I say it? It is NICE to be there. We spent a lot of time together as a family in this room and it was much better.

There was a meetup for my gran’s birthday and it was nice to see family for a good time. The kids did their best at behaving for 4+ hours and then we had to go home. I think that was pretty successful.

My sister came and stayed for the Sunday and it was great to spend a day with her. We fired into the Christmas movies watching Home Alone and then Die Hard after the kids were in bed. A classic movie pairing.

Second Weekend

My mum came on the Friday and stayed through until Sunday. She brought a kind of augmented reality Pictionary game which was a bit of a laugh to play. Sadly a little too advanced for one of the kids and I guess what we really wanted was a mode that just let you draw to amuse them.

We went to “breakfast with Santa” at an Ember Inn pub. The food was pretty disappointing. I am not typically the kind of person to complain about food. But yes this was pretty rough in almost all ways possible. I went home and made some proper boiled eggs on toast immediately after. I must acknowledge them doing a tough job, early in the morning, and with a new morning menu. But it was grim. It really was.

We went to see Elf – A Christmas Arena Spectacular at the OVO Hydro. I had a bit of a vertigo panic on taking my seats. Wow tier two is high. I wonder wtf tier three is like – without ever wanting to know! I got my anxiety under control eventually when the lights went out and the show started but it was a pretty tense 40 minute wait for that.

I then didn’t really see much of the show as I was constantly taking a child to or from the toilets (which were miles away). Or getting a drink etc.

Great to see mum but it meant that I missed out on the work Christmas do again due to the dates clashing. Still that is an improvement as I have missed a few out of pure anxiety for the travel. This year I was totally up for the travel but the date was announced too late for me and I’d finally booked stuff to do that weekend by then. To next year!

Third Weekend/Fourth Weekend/Christmas/New Year

Then.. We were ill. The run to the end of the year from here was a complete shit show of having flu and then being exhausted in loops. Being cooped up and locked in unable to do stuff. Surviving on shopping being delivered and giving the kids an impossible amount of screen time and the resulting chaos of their poor behaviour as a result. There is a reason they get 30 minute bites at computer games and take turns. It all went out the window in survival mode.

Oh and a rat decided to appear at our lowest point and basically ran around trashing stuff under the floor boards for days. Points to it as the first rodent to ever actually get food in our house because – we think – someone left the pantry cupboard door open a little bit. It then went nuts trying to break in again but couldn’t. It was hard to sleep because it was under the boards in my bedroom gnawing away all night long for what seemed like forever.

As a final fuck you on new years eve I tried to drive to the tip to take weeks worth of uncollected recycling. The car dashboard lit up like a Christmas tree and I think the battery is fucked. So I didn’t get outside for even the jolly of going to the tip and now the car is rammed with rubbish too.

Then on new years day I cracked into an egg and it had two yolks. A double yolker. I have heard of them, but never had one. I think 2023 is going to be a belter. How could it not when you start two yolks! Onwards and upwards.

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